Darkened Heart, Redemption
by Lita of the Dancing Flames
Summary: Akuroku, vaguely. This fic follows Axel through the majority of his events in KH2 and his reactions in response to Roxas, and later Sora. All the spoken dialogue comes directly from the cutscenes. The first chapter is quite dark, with Axel falling prey to darkness (basically), and the second chapter is based around "redemption". The genres are unfitting, please forgive me.
1. Fear

_A/N: Hiya! This is a fic for a tumblr Secret Santa group I'm a part of. I'm sooooo sorry it's not fluffy or romancey like you probably wanted, Serah, but hopefully you enjoy it anyway! I tried to write fluff, but it just wouldn't come out. I had planned for a different story entirely, but it didn't fit your requests quite right, and honestly it was quite angsty. It is implied AkuRoku, especially on Axel's part, but as it follows the game events quite strictly, the romance aspect is very subdued and not given in action between the two boys. _

_A/N2: This two-part story is a result of...I don't know, really. My friend gave me a handful of one word prompts to help me get started, and this first one is based on "Fear". The second chapter, a continuation, is based on the word "Wish". Honestly, I think the first chapter is better than the second despite its length, but I'll let my readers be the judge of that. But anyway. This story is, like I said in the summary, a fic that follows Axel's thoughts and actions during the recorded events in KH2 cutscenes as well as a bit that I added (and it could easily be canon) in the second chapter. I really couldn't find genres that really fit the story, so I tried my best. Anyway, I'll stop talking for now. Enjoy!_

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or its associated characters and plots. But oh, I wish I did.

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**Fear**

"Roxas. All right. Fight, fight, fight…You really don't remember. It's me. You know, Axel." Axel pushed his hood back, shaking his red spikes free of its black confines. At the complete lack of recognition from the blonde boy before him, his body felt cold. He forced himself to keep speaking. "Talk about blank with a capital "B". Man oh man, even the Dusks aren't gonna crack this one." The kid had no idea what Axel was talking about, and said as much. But he'd made a promise to always bring his friends back, no matter what. So that's what he would do. Maybe later Roxas would remember, and everything would be fine again. "You're coming with me, conscious or not. Then you'll hear the story."

Axel forced himself to fight his loved one. _Something like this has happened before_, he told himself. _You may not remember, but I'm sure it has. We just have to do it again. It'll be better in the long run_. He couldn't bring himself to use his full strength, but he had worn Roxas down, unused to such fighting as the boy was. He could easily knock him out and take him back to the Organization. But then DiZ interfered, and he lost track of Roxas temporarily.

He tracked the boy down again, though it wasn't too difficult, given the copycat town's small size. But now it was more important than ever to bring Roxas back. "Look at what it's come to," he told Roxas. "I've been given these icky orders to destroy you, if you refuse to come back with me." And it was true. His higher ups felt that it was best to eliminate the boy if he was no longer of use to them, given his betrayal some months ago.

"We're…best friends, right?" Roxas responded, hesitant.

"Well yeah, but I'm not getting turned into a Dusk for…" Suddenly Axel registered the words he'd just heard. "Wait a sec, you remember now?!" _He remembers me! I knew he would with just a little time_. But of course, if he wasn't thorough, his superiors would have his hide. So he asked the easiest question he could think of. "What's our boss's name?" Roxas stared at him for a second before flicking his eyes to the stick on the ground near him. With that, Axel realized that the blonde had no idea, and he was crushed all over again. "Can't believe this," he sighed.

Trying to process this new low, he sent a few Nobodies after the boy. He leaned against the wall and allowed himself to brood. _Roxas lied to me? I can't believe it. His assertion of being friends, appearing to remember, it was all just a trick? How could he do that? The Roxas I knew would never do that to me_. Then he noticed that the sound of combat had stopped. _Time to face him myself, I guess._ Axel summoned his chakrams and swung his arm back to strike. Then suddenly, Roxas disappeared. He looked around, but there was no sign of him. _Dammit! DiZ must've stopped time and allowed Roxas to escape me again_.

"The Roxas that I know is long gone. Fine, I see how it is." Axel felt hollow. His greatest fear had come true, from his most important person. _Forgotten_… His beloved had completely forgotten who he was. There wasn't even a trace of a memory in the kid's mind. "_I want everyone I meet to remember me. Inside people's memories, I can live forever_." Had that been such a shallow wish? Was this his punishment for saying such irresponsible things? It was just that he'd always been afraid of leaving no mark, of disappearing from the world with no one to notice his passing. And now, the one thing he'd been most scared of had come to pass. Roxas didn't know who he was anymore.

Fine then. If that was the way things were, then he'd change too. No more of this. It was too painful to deal with. He'd become a demon, and destroy first Roxas, then himself. Maybe they'd have better luck in another life.

"I'm SO FLATTERED! But you're too late!" Axel confronted Roxas for the last time. This was it. He'd take them both out right here, in a storm of flame. He summoned his chakrams one final time, and looked up with a dark grin sliding across his face.

_Time to face your demons, Roxas_.


	2. Wish

_A/N: Aaaaand the second part. It may be longer than the first, but I don't think it's quite as good. I think I may have said more than necessary. I still hope it's at least acceptable work... This chapter is supposed to be a lot lighter than the first because Axel regrets his actions and wants to do something to make it up somehow, which is what leads him to Sora. Same format applies, all dialogue is taken directly from the game. Enjoy! _

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**Wish**

Axel sat atop the clock tower in Twilight Town. It was just after what should have been his final clash with Roxas. He had fought him with all his strength to defeat him…or had he? He wasn't sure. One would think he, pretty much a veteran warrior, could defeat a boy who couldn't even remember his ability. Perhaps in the end, his heart just wouldn't let him hurt his love. He had thought for sure that at least he would fade, as he felt his strength drain as Roxas beat him down. He was very nearly destroyed; maybe seeing true recognition in the blonde's eyes at last had strengthened him somehow.

"_Axel." _

_He looked up from his crouch on the floor, breathing hard. Something in Roxas' tone had confused him. It sounded…soft? He met his eyes, and within the brilliant blue depths, he saw that Roxas finally remembered him. He smiled sadly; it really was too late for them now. "Let's meet again, in the next life," Axel said. _

"_Yeah. I'll be waiting." _

_Axel laughed shortly. "Silly. Just because you have a next life." He knew Roxas had Sora, so even if he were to disappear, he wouldn't be completely gone. As a Nobody without a Somebody, Axel would fade. And it seemed unlikely that he would be able to have another life. After all, he didn't have a heart, and that meant he didn't have a soul, right? _

_Axel used the last remnants of his strength to open a Dark Corridor and moved to the clock tower in the real Twilight Town. It was here he had the most memories, so it was the best place to fade from existence. He sprawled across the tower's ledge and waited for release. But it didn't come. After a while, he sat up, and realized that somehow, he was still here, still alive. _

Axel felt his strength slowly return to him as he considered his actions. What had he been trying to do? Nothing would come from destroying them both. He himself knew that they wouldn't have a chance in another life, so trying to kill them both was a foolish gesture. Roxas would live on in Sora and he would fade completely. Roxas would probably remember Axel killing him and only think of him with anger; that was not what he wanted. _Hell, even now he probably does, after what I just did._

What could he do now? Given DiZ's likely plan, Roxas was probably gone now anyway. He had been too late to stop him. And really, his actions would've accomplished the same thing as DiZ's, had he succeeded. Perhaps that's why he didn't interfere in the end. Axel never understood the strange figure. He always seemed to mess with the Organization's plans from the shadows.

_I wish I could go back. Rewind time. Roxas remembered me in the end. There must have been something I could have done, some way we could have done this that would have worked, probably even better than this had. I mean, Roxas is gone now, so my efforts…were in vain, right? I wish I could've seen this before. Then I could've done something different. I didn't have much time, I admit, but still, I'm sure I could've thought of something better than what the Organization wanted me to do. But damn. If wishes were fires, the worlds would burn. This train of thought is getting me nowhere. _

_Although, speaking of the Organization…you know what, I'm done with them. They've finally gone too far. They drove me into a corner with Roxas, knowing perfectly well how much I care for him. My elimination or bring him back. I'd thought it was an easy choice. But then they said to eliminate him. I shouldn't have listened. I should've taken the punishment right then. But if I had, someone else would've gone after him. Someone who really would have killed him. At least with me he had a fighting chance, and he did win after all. Still, he's part of Sora now, I think. _

_Sora…now there's a thought. Maybe if I can find Sora, I can see Roxas again. I'm sure he's got to be there somewhere. But how do I find Sora? The Organization will no doubt begin tracking him. I can't risk running into them. Let's see, what were those files on Sora again? They said something about his home world, and his reason for travelling, didn't they? If I can just remember those, I can use something to force him to come to me. If it's important enough, he'll have to. Roxas, I'm going to see you again. I definitely will. _

Axel had searched for quite some time, before he finally managed to find Destiny Islands and kidnap Kairi. He knew if he had Kairi, Sora would come racing after him. And with Sora, was Roxas. Kairi didn't understand what Axel was doing, and he didn't bother to explain. _She wouldn't get it anyway_. He had nearly captured her in the islands, but somehow she got away. Where that blasted dog and portal came from, he didn't know. Fortunately, he found her in Twilight Town. And then, since the Twilight Town gang saw her there and knew about Sora, surely the boy would come after her, so it worked out just as well for him, really.

But holding onto the girl pulled at his conscience. He let her go, but just when he did, Saix found them. He took Kairi himself, and Axel had to get away in the confusion before Saix managed to bring him down. He regretted leaving the girl to him, but what exactly was he supposed to do? _There's nothing I could do. I can be of no help at all if I'm gone. I'm sorry, Kairi. I didn't mean for that to happen_.

And to be of help…_What can I do now? I need to do something. Sora…I can find him and give him a boost. Even if I don't see Roxas…at least I can help Sora take down the ones that wanted him dead_. So Axel looked for him, and finally located him in Hollow Bastion.

"Man, you're slow. Every Heartless defeated with that Keyblade releases a captive heart. That is what the Organization is after." But of course, he couldn't just give everything away. He had to keep his information valuable. That way Sora would still need him for something. So when the duck asked what the Organization would do with the hearts, he simply replied, "I'm not telling."

Then Sora realized that Axel had been Kairi's abductor. Axel had feared this would come up, and knew he needed to tell him the truth, or at least part of it. "Look, about Kairi…I'm sorry." But before he could say anything more…

"Axel!"

"Uh-oh!" Saix had come, and Axel had to run again. He'd have to wait and find him again after he lost Saix again. The man really was like a wolf with that tracking ability of his.

It wasn't until Sora was attempting to enter The World That Never Was, the Organization's stronghold, that Axel caught up with him again. The boy was surrounded with Nobodies, even after fighting them off for so long. "Don't stop moving, or the darkness will overtake you!" Axel called out. He jumped in front of Sora, taking out a few Dusks in the process. "Get goin'!"

"Why?" asked Sora.

What? What was wrong with the kid, was he an idiot? "Don't ask, just do it!" In his distraction, a few other Dusks jumped him, and he fell beneath their weight. Suddenly they were gone, and he looked up to see Sora in front of him.

"You okay?"

He was asking Axel if he was okay? After kidnapping the girl he loved? _What a weirdo_. Axel quickly explained what happened with Kairi, before snapping, "Now go save her!"

More Dusks appeared, and Sora, frustrated, turned to fight them off. Axel jumped up and joined the fight. They worked together for what seemed like ages, but the tide of enemies never ended. "I think I liked it better when they were on my side," Axel claimed.

"Feeling a little…regret?" Sora teased.

Axel paused a moment, considering. If they didn't do something big, the Nobodies would keep coming forever. They really were endless. He quickly came to a decision. _I knew I would never see him again, anyway_. "Nah, I can handle these punks. Watch this!"

Axel summoned all of his strength into one attack, and the entire place erupted into flame around him with a blinding light. When Sora could see again, the corridor was empty of enemies, and he found Axel on the ground, with what looked like a cloud of darkness forming in the air from his body.

_I'm fading_…

Sora looked panicked as he stated what Axel already knew. "Well," he said, "that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack." Then he went on to ramble, "Not that Nobodies actually HAVE beings…right?" Realizing he was going off on a tangent, he reminded Sora he had to save Kairi. He also finally managed to apologize for taking her to begin with.

"When we find her, you can tell her that yourself," Sora said, ever the optimist even when it was obvious it just won't happen.

"Think I'll pass," Axel replied. "My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know? Haven't got one." He laughed, though with some difficulty.

"Axel…what were you trying to do?" _Oh? Sora finally asked a good question. What d'you know? Maybe the kid's got some smarts after all_.

Axel thought about it at first, whether he should just say it or not, but decided, _Hey, I'm fading. What does it matter? Maybe Roxas will even be able to hear me_. "I wanted to see Roxas." Speaking was becoming difficult. "He…was the only one I liked…" Truth poured from his lips. "He made me feel…like I had a heart." _And I loved him_.

Axel's time was about to run out. He opened a portal with the last vestiges of his strength. "Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now go!"

As Sora said his name, he finally faded into nothingness. The last thoughts of his consciousness echoed in the void. _Did I do good, Roxas? I hope you can remember me with fondness, and not anger. I loved you, you know. I wanted to protect you, but I failed. I just hope that if I do have a next life, that you're in it. _

_Goodbye…Roxas_.


End file.
